The sounds of silence would be welcome now
As my mind swirls with thoughts and questions.
The screams, the put downs, the anger is ever present
As my soul yearns for quietude and peace.
The colors which have always been obvious to me
Are blended together in shades of dark light and light dark.
Do you see the anguish present in the light
Or the darkness present in the anguish?
Perhaps I will close my eyes and imagine peace or hope
Yet when I close my eyes I am afraid of what I may miss.
What if the world ceases to exist
Or the existence present ceases in the world?
I turn my eyes and attention upward
Hoping that God will respond to my despair.
Will what I hope for ever come to be
Or will I stop hoping for the future?
Adonai – be with me as you always have been.
Hashem – guide me in the path forward.
El Shaddai – protect me from continued despair.
Shechinah – meet me, direct me and stay with me.
Israel – the homeland of the Jews, the Promised Land, Eretz Yisrael, Ha-Aretz. As a kid, I always envisioned what Israel would be like. I saw the many posters in my synagogue, I watched the videos and read the stories. When I first traveled to Israel in 1999, what I experienced on my first trip I could not have been prepared for. There were modern buildings. We had dinner in a mall. Israel was just like America in so many ways. As a tourist, I was in awe at the beauty and wonder of Israel. Sixteen years later, I am still in awe at the wonder that is Israel, but I am also keenly aware of the challenges and questions facing Israelis every day.
While I was living in Israel in 2007, I took a taxi with a few of my friends to go to the mall. As was usually the case, the driver started to ask us about our visit to Israel. When one of my friends, a female cantoral student, remarked she was studying to be a Chazanit, the driver stopped his cab, yelled that there was no such thing as a female Chazan, and then kicked us out of his cab. This story is a clear example of some of the questions and challenges facing Israel, even today.
Rabbi Miri Gold earned the dual distinction of being the first female AND the first non-Orthodox rabbi to receive a paycheck from the State of Israel as a rabbi. Anat Hoffman, often seen being arrested at the Western Wall for her leadership of Women of the Wall, just wants the right to pray, read Torah and wear a Tallis. These are just two incredible women doing their parts to ensure gender equality in Israel. Rabbi Gold, because she is not an Orthodox rabbi, is not granted the same status as her Orthodox colleagues. The very character of the State of Israel is affected by these unequal policies. By denying its non-Orthodox Jewish citizens equal treatment under the law, Israel violates its own Declaration of Independence, which guarantees freedom of religion.
As a rabbi, I stand 100% with Israel. I love Israel – the people, the food, the culture. However, as an American Jew, I understand also that there are opportunities for me (and all American Jews) to help shape the future of Israel. Israel is not just the homeland for Israeli Jews; no, it is the homeland for all Jews. As a Reform Rabbi, I support ARZA – the Association of Reform Zionists of America. ARZA speaks for all Jews, providing a valuable voice for Women’s Rights and Gender Equality, Religious Equality among all Jews, and for the safety, security and stability of Israel, the Palestinians and the entire Middle East Region.
So, the question is – will you step up and do your part to help create an Israel that cherishes the same values we cherish?? Each of us has a critical voice, and a critical opportunity. Israel was founded to be a pluralistic and democratic Jewish state. By supporting ARZA in the WZC election, you will ensure that the dream of the founders of Israel will be realized.
How can you be involved? Visit arza.org/election to learn more about the elections, and how your vote will matter. Beginning January 21, 2020, and running through March 11, 2020, VOTE. You can vote online or with a paper ballot. The vote costs $7.50 for those over age 25 and $5 for those 25 and under. The future of Israel is in your hands!
I had the privilege and honor to represent Temple Beth El at the URJ Biennial just a few weeks ago. There were so many opportunities for learning, having fun, socializing, praying, singing, etc. It was truly an amazing experience and one I look forward to every 2 years (or really think about it all the time!). However, just a few days after I returned from Chicago, I read on Facebook something that really hit me quite hard.
In today’s world, we often speak about privilege and what it means to be privileged. Perhaps we even take for granted things we do not realize we are privileged to have or be a part of. Attendance at the URJ Biennial is a privilege and a great honor. However, my experience was quite different from one of my friends, and I hope you will recognize very quickly how the concept of “privilege” can mean many different things for many different people. What I am about to read is an excerpt from one of the presenters/teachers at the Biennial, Marra Gad:
“For those of you who are not aware, one week ago, I arrived at the Union for Reform Judaism Biennial Conference in Chicago, and from moment one, things did not go as any of us had hoped they would.
When I went to pick up my credentials, I was told that the ‘REAL’ Marra Gad needed to pick up her badge. And when I replied that I was the real Marra Gad, I did not receive an apology. Instead, the person behind the desk said, ‘Really!?’
When I was eventually given my very bright orange badge that clearly said PRESENTER across the bottom….
I was assumed to be hotel staff. Twice. While wearing my bright orange badge. And told that I needed to do more to get room service orders out more quickly.
I was aggressively asked repeatedly WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? And when I would reply that I was a featured speaker on Shabbat afternoon, I was then asked what I could possibly have to speak about.
I ended up in an elevator filled with attendees who elected to whisper about me. What I was doing there. And, again, what I could possibly be presenting about. LIKE I WASN’T THERE.”
While I will read some more from Marra’s post later on in my sermon, I wanted to stop there and stress a few points I understand from Marra’s post. In the past few years, our society has become super aware of the differences between people. We have found ways to celebrate these differences, while at the same time appreciating what we have in common. There have been some great successes and unfortunately there have also been some terrible failures. It is important to point out that the way some people deal with their own embarrassment is to joke or play it off as a joke…but that does not take away from the seriousness of how others may feel, react or respond.
Assumptions are another problem. We all do this, so I am certainly not pointing fingers. However, we can, and we should do better. Rabbi Rick Jacobs, the President of the Union for Reform Judaism, reached out to Marra privately, to issue an apology. He also wrote an outstanding public apology. Although he was apologizing for himself, he also spoke beautifully about our movement’s responsibility to prevent these types of events from happening:
“I need to publicly apologize to Marra Gad, who endured numerous acts of racism at the recent URJ Biennial in Chicago. I’m the president of the Union for Reform Judaism – and what happened to Marra happened on my watch. I’m deeply sorry for each painful encounter…”
“Her experiences took place at a Biennial at which I addressed this issue head-on. On Thursday night at Biennial, I spoke at length about embracing the diversity within our Jewish community as we simultaneously call out and face the racism within every part of our Reform Jewish community. (You can find that address here: https://bit.ly/2rtCR0C) Marra’s experience, and the experiences of other participants of marginalized identities from whom we have heard, only underscore the urgency of this work.”
During his Biennial address on Thursday night, December 12, Rabbi Jacobs instructed us in ways we can widen our Jewish tents: smashing divisions such as racism, sexism, etc.; committing to anti-racism, not just being “not a racist;” and by making people who enter our tent feel as if they belong from the moment we meet them. Most importantly, we must realize and understand that no one looks Jewish anymore and there is not one authentic way of being Jewish anymore. Rabbi Jacobs spoke about embracing those who are “Jewish adjacent,” which very broadly is defined as someone who participates in Jewish religious or cultural practices without having converted to Judaism. We are not diluting Judaism; we are bringing Judaism to more Jews by honoring diversity and strengthening our communities.
If we turn to our sacred text, the Torah, we find answers to even the hardest of topics such as this. Just one verse beyond what I read from Torah tonight is a very important moment for the future of the Jewish people:
וְעַתָּ֡ה שְׁנֵֽי־בָנֶיךָ֩ הַנּוֹלָדִ֨ים לְךָ֜ בְּאֶ֣רֶץ מִצְרַ֗יִם עַד־בֹּאִ֥י אֵלֶ֛יךָ מִצְרַ֖יְמָה לִי־הֵ֑ם אֶפְרַ֙יִם֙ וּמְנַשֶּׁ֔ה כִּרְאוּבֵ֥ן וְשִׁמְע֖וֹן יִֽהְיוּ־לִֽי׃
Now, your two sons, who were born to you in the land of Egypt before I came to you in Egypt, shall be mine; Ephraim and Manasseh shall be mine no less than Reuben and Simeon.
Manasseh and Ephraim take Joseph’s “slot” in the land holding – in the spaces around the Ark and in the Land of Israel surrounding Jerusalem once they get there! It is the passing of the blessing from Jacob to Joseph and Ephraim and Manasseh that continues the line of Abraham, continuing to fulfill God’s promise to Abraham. Ephraim and Manasseh were born to a non-Jewish woman, Joseph’s Egyptian wife, Asenath.
Not only do we find Patrilineal descent, Judaism passed down from the father, here, we also find two children from a very different culture being embraced as part of the early Israelite community. Jacob adopts Joseph’s sons as his own, breaking any barrier that may have been present. We learn from Jacob the important lesson of inclusion. While we do a pretty good job of this here at Temple Beth El, there is always room for improvement…another important message gleaned from Rabbi Jacobs as he addressed the 5,000 Biennial attendees:
“Schedule a training about equity, inclusion, and antiracism in your community. Learn about unconscious and implicit bias, and how to be a better ally. Lean on our Audacious Hospitality Toolkit for Congregations and dig deeper into social justice activism through the RAC to address racism in our broader society. When marginalized members of your community find the courage to speak up, treat this as a gift, and listen deeply to what they have to say. Commit to antiracism and other active forms of fighting oppression. Take the time to reflect and make an honest accounting of your own actions. I know I will. It is time that we make every person that comes under our tent feel like they already belong.”
Will the actions suggested by Rabbi Jacobs solve all of the problems? No…but it will lead to huge improvements in the lives of every member of our community. We must acknowledge that racism exists not just outside of our community, but also within our community. The alternative to not embracing these differences is to continually alienate potential members of our community as well as current members of our community. We must do everything in our power to avoid this – for the benefit of our Jewish future and for all of our children!
Earlier in my sermon, I spoke about privilege. In today’s society, we often hear the phrase “white privilege.” It exists and is dangerous if we do not recognize and change our attitudes, not just our behaviors. Toward the end of her post, Marra wrote:
“And then, 2 of my trusted friends with whom I was discussing all of this and who also happen to be rabbis, suggested that most people really don’t understand what the experiences at Biennial felt like for me. Because they cannot. Because it would not happen to them. Because they are white. And I am not. And for a moment, that made sense. But, as I continue to consider the question, I would offer that Jews should absolutely understand because of what it feels like to be on the receiving end of anti-Semitism. Racism, anti-Semitism, homophobia, anti-OTHER ism…. they are all abuses of the soul. And to be on the receiving end of it is a trauma. And it is a trauma that Jews know very well.
Jews know what it feels like to be stared at. Whispered about. Not made to feel welcome. To feel unsafe.”
My friends and family, there are several common themes throughout the Torah and our liturgy. One of the most important is:
כִּֽי־גֵרִ֥ים הֱיִיתֶ֖ם בְּאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרָֽיִם
“Because you were strangers in the Land of Egypt.”
These few extremely important words flow through our lives as a constant reminder of what it feels to be “the other.” Marra Gad’s experiences at the Biennial are only one example of something that is horrible and avoidable. We must open our minds, our hearts and our souls to embrace anyone and everyone that chooses our Tent. At the Biennial, we were challenged to commit to doing this work together. We will because we must.
Let me end this sermon tonight with a very important prayer found in the Talmud, Tractate Berachot 58a:
“Baruch hachacham ha’razeem she’ayn da’atam domah zeh l’zeh V’Ein Partzufayhen domeem zeh l’zeh.
״בָּרוּךְ … חֲכַם הָרָזִים״ — שֶׁאֵין דַּעְתָּם דּוֹמָה זֶה לָזֶה, וְאֵין פַּרְצוּפֵיהֶן דּוֹמִים זֶה לָזֶה
Blessed are You, the Sage of all secret things for their minds are not similar to each other and their faces are all unique.” (Babylonian Talmud, tractate Berachot 58a)
I have spent the past week thinking about so many things. I really wanted to begin some serious and genuine reflection on 2019 while at the same time considering the excitement of 2020. I am lucky to serve a truly wonderful community. My family feels so incredibly blessed to be here and we truly appreciate the love we receive. Thankfully, my kids and wife are healthy and happy. We are thankful we have a roof over our heads and food to eat. There really is so much to be thankful for...and spending a week in Houston with family was seriously rewarding and refreshing. Celebrating the 80th birthday of Marilyn Ozaroff was so much fun!
Hanukkah was supposed to be festive and full of joy. While there was both light and joy during Hanukkah, there was also feelings of regret, devastation, angst, fear. It seemed that every day brought a new cause for anger or fear. This was the dawn of 2020 and yet I was still faced with the same terror and trauma that has faced my community for what seems like our entire existence. This is the United States of America - the "Beacon on the Hill." This nation was supposed to be different.
I am well aware that among my group of friends and family, we have many disagreements. We have many different opinions on every topic. It is sometimes hard to come to an agreement. There are, however, some no-brainers. Hating another person because of their religion, their skin color, their nation of origin...or in any other way is not just wrong...it is tragic for all of us. Acts of violence or terror against another should NEVER be ok. I have always been proud to be Jewish...and I truly have only had to fear being Jewish a few times in my life. What I do not want is for my children (or any children) to ever feel afraid because of how they identify. Hearing of the anti-Semitic events of the past few days and weeks just added to an already awful 2019.
Don't get me wrong...there were wonderful times in 2019...many of them, personal and public. And, I am not going jump off the deep end. I am angry. I am afraid. Yet, I know I must be strong for my family, my community and for the future. So, what do I do? I write; I speak out; I act. This is the way to get things done. People need to be aware of what is going on around them. Ignorance is usually the root of evil...not always, but more often than not. People tend to be afraid of what they do not know or understand. So, their reaction is violence or terror toward the "other."
I refuse to let the actions of others define who I am or my experiences. I refuse to sit back and "let things go." I want to cry out; I want to act; I want to fight back. This does NOT mean I believe violence begets violence. Fighting back does not have to be violent. It can be with love...Love is stronger than fear...there is no doubt in my mind.
God – do you hear my thoughts? What should I do?
I am physically trembling in fear; anger; resentment.
I feel my soul being torn apart with every news cycle.
Events; Situations; Violence; Ignorance.
My brain hurts from the constant wave of thoughts.
Spiritually, I feel drained; exhausted; terrified.
I want to run and tear something apart.
Crying; Emotional; Pain; Fear.
God – I know you are there. Please take my hand.
Show me what to do; how to act and take the next step.
Tears dry on my face as I search for the right perspective.
Tired; Sleep; Awake; “Woke.”
I need to do something, to lead others away from this pain.
I can pray with them; for them; about them; to them.
My gut tells me to do more – but I do not know how.
Attacks; More attacks; Even more attacks; End?
The sun will rise tomorrow; of this I am certain.
I will pray; I will act; I will do.
God – be with me and help me to help others.
Love; Prayer; Heart; #Strongerthanhate.
I am a husband, father and rabbi - just trying to help to make the world a better place!