My Dear Friend - Angela Gold

3/27/2019

There are people in your life that make indelible imprints on you. There are those that come and go. And, there are those special people in your life that you lose touch with...and fate/B'sheret brings them back into your life. This post is about one of these people. I vividly remember when I met Angela Gold.

I attended many conventions in high school and college. These were usually for "future Jewish educators." Of course, many of us expected we would be rabbis, cantors or "Professional Jews." These conventions were really just an excuse to renew friendships or make new ones. Yes, there were educational and religious aspects of these conventions. However, it was about the relationships made - with other participants AND with the educators.

There were a group of us - maybe 5 or 6 - that always "hung out." We just naturally were drawn to each other. Perhaps we had similar senses of humor...who knows? What mattered to us was that we had a connection - a bond. One of those people - Jason Schnee - introduced me to my wife (we met at his wedding). Until I reconnected with Angela in 2011, at the URJ Biennial, Jason was the only person from that special group of friends that I stayed in contact with.

At the Biennial in Washington, DC, I saw Angela from across the hotel lobby. It was as if no time had passed. At least 10 years had passed since we saw each other last...however, our friendship was rekindled and it was as strong as it ever was. One late night at the Biennial, Angela told me some very private news - she had a brain tumor, an operation and was in recovery. I didn't believe her at first - she was so young...

Since that night in 2011, I have made sure to include Angela as a part of my family - she and my wife became friends. At the Biennial in Orlando, when Danika turned 1, we included Angela in our family celebration. She is family...she always will be. Angela has a smile that stretches from one end of the room to the other - it is completely contagious and her laugh is just as wonderful. Since 2011, Angela and I have seen each other 3 times...and each time I have been reminded of how special she is and why I am so blessed to be one of her friends.

When she first spoke with me regarding her illness/recovery, she made it very clear that her name was NOT to be added to my congregation's Mi Shebeirach list. She did not want her brain tumor and subsequent surgeries/recoveries to a) define who she is or b) dominate her conversations or relationships. I could tell that if I even mentioned it to her, she was not pleased. She wanted to talk about what was going on in our lives (positive) and the future. She has always been someone who looks forward rather than back...

As a rabbi, I find it a blessing to be with people in their most vulnerable of times - often when a family member is sick or at the end of his/her life. This is painful for the family, their communities and yes, even for me. However, when it is someone that I have known for many years of my life, it hurts much more. I find some comfort in writing and sharing my feelings with others. Just a few weeks ago, I saw an update on Angela's CaringBridge page that shook me.

Angela has always been one of the strongest people I know. To read that she is no longer able to accomplish daily tasks shook me to the core. The pain Angela is feeling right now is unfair and I would not wish it on anyone. Her family and friends have tried to rally to help her mom and make life as easy and happy as possible. The pain...it is overwhelming to think about.

To learn about Angela - to see the impact she has had and still continues to have on people, check out her CaringBridge page: https://www.caringbridge.org/visit/angelagold

If you would like to help offset her medical expenses, please visit her GoFundMe page:
https://www.gofundme.com/help-angela-gold-with-medical-expsnes?fbclid=IwAR00FwtZLdQzMvVW5iwpME1Vk5hKEgXpqlEK-fD8MF0WLCdJrcMXVHFOS9A

Sending prayers of healing and strength to Angela, her Mom Elaine and to all of us who are blessed to have Angela in our lives.

Elaine Unell

3/27/2019 12:24:36 pm

Dear Erin,
Thank you so much for this heartwarming article and sharing your feelings about my daughter. It touches me deeply to know your feelings and that you care enough to share them with so many. Most of Angela’s life I have known her basically as a mother knows a daughter. AsI hear more and more from her friends I have come to know and love her even more in all new ways. I am totally amazed to learn of the great impact her existence has made for so many different people. It saddens me tremendously that she has not been able to have the dreams she had for her future fulfilled, but knowing the positive effect she has had on so many people has given me much comfort. Thank you. Elaine.... proud mom

Ben Schleimer

5/30/2019 03:48:39 am

Thank you for sharing. Angela was quite a wonderful human being, even for the short time that I knew her in the Bay Area. She was active in the Jewish community here and taught and sang and led us to a more hopeful and joyous reality.

Sincerely, Ben - friend

Melinda

5/31/2019 03:20:27 am

Dear Friends and Family of Angela (z"l),
As everyone has expressed, I am profoundly saddened by Angela's death. I knew Angela as an acquaintance through attending an annual sing-along gathering honoring the memory of Debbie Friedman, held at Rabbi Stuart and Vicky Kelman's home in Berkeley. Angela, along with a few of her singing peers, simply lit up the room with her talent, her energy, and her ability to inspire through having learned with Debbie while infusing her own unique gifts.

I listened to Angela's funeral webcast and heard Rabbi Zwerin's beautifully expressed sentiments and stories of his first interview audition of Angela as a cantorial soloist and her eventual impact on him and his congregation in Denver (early 2000s). But what struck me most was his comment about having lost his young daughter at age 19 to a brain tumor. Through a Google search, I found this was in 1984 and Rabbi Zwerin and his family were living in Denver. While Angela came to live in the Denver area to work as cantorial soloist at Rabbi Zwerin's synagogue - albeit many years later in her mid-20s in the early 2000s (I believe), the coincidence led me to look further online for any possible hazards affecting women, young women, in the Denver vicinity. I found some information on the "Rocky Flats" nuclear weapons plant assembly, which was located 15 miles northwest of Denver and allegedly shut down in the 1980s/1990s, with clean up projects still being done decades since. I am not an environmental researcher, epidemiologist, or clinician, but this plant's hazardous imprint in the surrounding community to the soil, water sources, etc., may be vital to look into in honor of Angela's life, Rabbi Zwerin's daughter, and other precious lives - past, present, and future advocacy. There are several research articles/study publications online about the Rocky Flats, which, sadly, has an area "deemed safe" as an active nature preserve for visitors. Please read and try to learn about this. Was Angela's brain tumor, first diagnosed within a few years of (?) living in Denver, related to exposure or in part a consequence of exposure? https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rocky_Flats_Plant

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My Dear Friend - Angela Gold

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